Valentine’s Day Won”t Fix the Hurt in Your Marriage


couple flowers.jpg

Don’t expect Valentine’s Day to fix your hurt!

Neither one of you can make-up for sharp words or walls built for self-protection by one dinner out or one array of flowers.

Pretending it didn’t happen (for that one day) is not reality either.

What you could say is: Hey, I know things aren’t great right now, but I still want to be with you. I want to make a place for ‘us’.

Then, agree on a time to have a talk about what’s going on – a different time than your Date Night.

It’s amazing how that simple act will diffuse anxiety and then you really can enjoy (at least a bit more) the expected Valentine’s Day activity.

Nobody is a mind-reader.

~You don’t know his fears (if what you see is anger).

~He doesn’t know your hurt (if what you show him is distance).

Your goal is NOT 💯 agreement.
Your goal is understanding.

Understanding only comes through connecting with intentional words and your whole person.

The good news is: you can be heard, understood and loved.

It just takes a willingness to heal and a commitment to learn communication skills.

God’s love is limitless. HE’ll walk you through every step.

To build connection in simple steps you can do daily, try the 30-Day Marriage Challenge. You can find in in the Free Resource section of my website https://marywhitmanortiz.com/books-and-resources

If you’d like more one-to-one support, the Love Sense Questionnaire and Coaching Session is amazing. I’m offering it as a Valentine’s Day Special Feb 19, 2020. Check that out here

https://marywhitmanortiz.com/love-sense-special

Remember, you can be heard, understood and loved.

Valentine’s Day Won”t Fix the Hurt in Your Marriage


couple flowers.jpg

Don’t expect Valentine’s Day to fix your hurt!

Neither one of you can make-up for sharp words or walls built for self-protection by one dinner out or one array of flowers.

Pretending it didn’t happen (for that one day) is not reality either.

What you could say is: Hey, I know things aren’t great right now, but I still want to be with you. I want to make a place for ‘us’.

Then, agree on a time to have a talk about what’s going on – a different time than your Date Night.

It’s amazing how that simple act will diffuse anxiety and then you really can enjoy (at least a bit more) the expected Valentine’s Day activity.

Nobody is a mind-reader.

~You don’t know his fears (if what you see is anger).

~He doesn’t know your hurt (if what you show him is distance).

Your goal is NOT 💯 agreement.
Your goal is understanding.

Understanding only comes through connecting with intentional words and your whole person.

The good news is: you can be heard, understood and loved.

It just takes a willingness to heal and a commitment to learn communication skills.

God’s love is limitless. HE’ll walk you through every step.

To build connection in simple steps you can do daily, try the 30-Day Marriage Challenge. You can find in in the Free Resource section of my website https://marywhitmanortiz.com/books-and-resources

If you’d like more one-to-one support, the Love Sense Questionnaire and Coaching Session is amazing. I’m offering it as a Valentine’s Day Special Feb 19, 2020. Check that out here

https://marywhitmanortiz.com/love-sense-special

Remember, you can be heard, understood and loved.